Plaisance Primary educates fathers on bullying and mentoring |10 May 2007
It can happen at home, at work or at school. Some of the ways bullies torment others include:
- name calling i.e. teasing
- saying or writing nasty things about them
- leaving them out of activities
- not talking to or ignoring them
- threatening them
- making them feel uncomfortable and scared
- taking or damaging their things
- hitting or kicking them
- making them do things they do not want to do
Until a few years ago the issue of bullying especially amongst children was largely ignored in Seychelles simply because students, teachers and parents were not properly sensitised on the problem and its consequences. Nowadays schools are becoming more proactive in their quest to tackle this problem. They address it during assemblies, PTA meetings and workshops with parents and other stakeholders in order to create awareness.
1. sensitising members of the committee on bullying
2. empowering them with the necessary skills and knowledge to become mentors
3. preparing them to take a leading role in educating other fathers on bullying and mentoring
The session was facilitated by the head teacher, Mr. Cyril Pillay, with the assistance of the school’s Subject Co-ordinators, Counsellor and Professional Development Facilitator. They had prepared various activities to enable the participants to discuss the topic openly, learn more about it and its consequences.
The first series of activities focused on bullying, where fathers were invited to share their personal experience or knowledge of the topic, define what it means and provide examples. Most of the participants admitted that they were bullied during their school days and they suffered in silence because such incidents could not be reported and also they thought it was normal for children to torment each other. One participant even confessed that he was a bully and he expressed remorse for the suffering he has caused to others. The activities proved that in general the fathers have a very clear notion of what is bullying and its different types i.e. verbal, physical and psychological.
Afterwards, the fathers were sensitized on the consequences of bullying. The facilitator, Mr Pillay, explained how the problem can seriously affect the victim’s academic performance since she/he is most likely to develop a strong distaste for school. This is usually manifested through truancy or pretending to be sick every morning. More seriously, the victim may suffer in silence and might feel suicidal after a while. When presented with the consequences participants pointed out that they were aware of the negative impact of bullying but they were oblivious to the extent to which the victim can be affected.
In the last activity on bullying, the fathers were asked to suggest structures that the school could put in place to help both bullies and victims. The following were proposed:
- increase the number of supervisors on the playground during breaks
- teachers should practise active listening and watch for early signs of distress and offer the victim immediate support
- fathers should talk to their children about bullying and if they know that their child is a bully or a victim proper counselling should be done
- introduce father and peer mediation
- empower pupils with social skills
- the school should openly talk about bullying
- foster co-operative learning in the classroom
- set up a suggestion box
The second set of activities was on mentoring. The facilitator highlighted the three important stages of mentoring and they are pre-observation, observation and post-observation. In doing so he stressed that there must always be an initial point of focus when working with the bully/victim. Once this has been established the latter will be observed/ interviewed to ascertain to what extent he or she is putting into practice what has been discussed in the pre-observation stage. During the post-observation the mentor will confer with his/ her protégé on the outcome of the observation to assess whether any improvements were made.
At the end of the session the participants carried out an evaluation of the session and they claimed that it was a real eye-opener and they feel that they are now better prepared to talk about the issue with their children.